Now for something completely different

Well, it's been a big day. Sometime in the night "A Time for Poncey" went live at Amazon without a hitch, which is a major thing in this time of high-tech. All I'm waiting for now is for it to show up on Goodreads. If any of you like it enough, feel free to rate and review it on Amazon and Goodreads. Here's a hint for all you insiders: The first free giveaway will be this Thursday.

Now it's off to the next project, in earnest. It will be another collection of Southern Gothic stories exploring spiritual themes, but these will have no connection to each other. I'll also throw in some poetry for good measure. The flagship story, which I think will be called "Little Egypt Ain't Home," will be available for free online soon. I'll post a link here so all my devoted blog fans can find it. Also included will be "Spinning Wheel," which is now available for about a quarter at AlfieDog.com. A few of the stories are written and ready to go, and I've spent a good part of today sending them to literary journals. If any see the light of day, I'll let you know.

With that I wish you all a wonderful Labor Day weekend. I'm going to take a nap.

The big day approaches

Well, tomorrow is the big release day. To get the direct link to Amazon first, join our Facebook page. "A Time for Poncey" will be available only in .mobi, the Kindle-friendly format. However, the first story, "You Can't Count What Isn't There," will continue to be available on Smashwords for the next few months, and it will be posted as a free download at St. Celibart soon. It is also still part of "The Job: Based on a True Story," "Feallengod" and "Wars of the Aoten." Yesterday was another free giveaway of "The Job" through Kindle Select, and more than 500 copies were taken. So thanks to everyone who's got a copy, and I hope you're blessed and see your relationship with Christ more clearly. Same goes with "Poncey."

More good news for Nooks

For those of you who use Nooks, you'll be happy to know that "Feallengod: The Conflict in the Heavenlies" is again available for you at Barnes and Noble online. And it's free! It was my first book, and I still believe it is my most important writing - I took all the instances in Scripture where Satan is seen overtly active and wrote them into a single narrative. At the same time, the story is staged at a human level to illustrate how the Church is involved in spiritual struggles even in our material existence. Barnes and Noble shoppers have been very kind to my study on Esther, so I hope you'll try out "Feallengod" also. And be sure to check out the pronouncing appendix at nearly the end.

Also, "You Can't Count What Isn't There" is included in the current edition, which is at the very-most end of the book. It's the first story from "A Time for Poncey - And other Stories out of Skullbone" (in case you haven't been paying attention) which is coming out for Kindle in four days!!!! Join us for the big galactic release at our Facebook event.

Sony readers rejoice!

After an inordinate waiting period, "You Can't Count What Isn't There" is now available for Sony readers. Follow this link to get your free copy. It's the first story from "A Time for Poncey - And other Stories out of Skullbone," which will be released for Kindle only on Sept. 1. If you use a Sony reader, you may wonder, why bother with the story if the book is for Kindle only. Well, you can get Kindle reading software for your computer for free, and read the whole book there (cause believe me, you'll want to), so don't be shy!

News for Nooks

The first Poncey story, "You Can't Count What Isn't There," is now up and running at Barnes & Noble. It's completely 100% free. I've also included it in "Wars of the Aoten" at the Kindle store, so go for it. It still hasn't shown up at the Sony book store, which is the last of the major distributors, so stay tuned for that. And that's all I want to say about that.


I will mention that I've just learned the British slang "poncy" means pretentious, which seems to fit.

What a Difference a Day Makes

At the Clarksville Writers Conference, which I attended a couple weeks ago, one of the tips offered by Peggy DeKay, the author of several e-marketing books, was to offer KDP Select titles for free on Wednesday, Thursday or Friday. I've had good results from this program, but I've always made my books available on weekends. The first time around I got about 450 downloads of "The Job," and in subsequent promotions would get 200-240 or so. So for this latest promotion I switched from the weekend and tried Thursday-Friday. As a result, 400 copies of "The Job" were downloaded, which is particularly important since I've included a story from "A Time for Poncey" in the updated edition. That's an increase of at least 60% over my other promotions (excluding the initial one). So there are 400 more readers with a copy of both "The Job" and "You Can't Count What Isn't There" to be seen and read and passed around. Look for future promotions to fall at the end of the work week.


In other news, "You Can't Count What Isn't There" is up and running on Kobo. I don't know what a Kobo reader is, but for the thousands of you who use them, today's your lucky day. The story is also available at the iTunes store, for all your iPad and iPhone reading apps, but since you don't get there through the web, I can't give you a link. But here's what it looks like:

You Can't Count What Isn't There

One of the biggest cogs in the publicity machine for "A Time for Poncey" is the first story, "You Can't Count What Isn't There." The story is available at St. Celibart to read online, and in every e-book format you can think of at Smashwords. Absolutely free.

 On top of that, I've included it as a bonus in the Kindle versions of "The Job: Based on a True Story" and "Feallengod." Just go to the end of the book, and there it'll be. I may add it to "Wars of the Aoten" as well, but that's later to be determined. I'll let you know.

"Madness Is In Their Hearts"

Dr. Hurley's Snake-Oil Cure has posted the first part of "Madness Is In Their Hearts," so please give it a look. Even if you don't want to read it, click on the link and give them a page hit. The story is part of "A Time for Poncey," for which I will soon start turning the marketing gears, looking at a Sept. 1, 2012 release. It's classic Southern Gothic writing based on Ecclesiastes, with a wicked twist of humor. So please help get the word around by directing folks to Dr. Hurley's. I think you'll find some other interesting arts there as well. Thanks.

New Marketing and Old Media I

Well, I've obviously not been around here much lately, and I doubt I will be in the future. I must not be doing this tagging thing right, because this blog does not come up very high on searches that I need it to. "Christian humor" may just be too ubiquitous on the web. Anyway, here's another review, someone who obviously didn't get it. Why do these reviews always end up on Amazon, but the insightful ones don't? One of the big hurdles I've encountered is that online reviewers say they're prepared for Christian fiction, but then don't read with that in mind. There's a real possibility that they can only handle the most obvious of Christian content. Just waiting for that next "Left Behind" story.

So, anyway, it's on to phase two. I determined long ago that blog reviewers have no influence at all, and that to get exposure to a large audience, the traditional media is still necessary. But my strategy was to collect enough minor reviews to throw myself to the traditional media wolves again, and so I have. At the beginning of this gambit, which started last Labor Day, I sent copies cold to a number of magazines and other outlets, and mostly got zero response. Today I sent out a dozen emails to some of these - Christianity Today, CCM Magazine, &c. - with links to the better online reviews. My hope is they'll do a little research and decide I'm legit. If I get anything to show from this, I'll let you know.

New Media and New Marketing XX

Well, I've not been around here for awhile, and I've got to mention that I'm about to give up. I continue to get good reviews for "The Job," for instance this new one at Simul Iustus et Peccator, but these things don't seem to ever show up on Amazon, Goodreads, B&N, Smashwords, &c. &c. where they could actually do some good. As well, a quick googling of some of my key words to this blog shows that it's not showing up even on the first 10 search pages. So what's the point? (or "pint," as I nearly typed). This blog has three followers, and I'm one of them.

On top of that, I was shut out of the Independent Publisher Awards, the only contest I had a chance to be recognized in. I'd entered in the humor and religious fiction categories, and came away with nothing. Not really surprising, but the winner of silver in religious fiction was "The Sherlock Holmes Church Mysteries." This was an author who stole an iconic secular literary character, long after its creator was dead, and adapted it to her agenda. And she gets an award for it. So I'm pretty close to giving up any kind of marketing. It's not what I should be about, anyway. Success in the marketplace is not the raison d'etre of art and literature, and certainly not of the Church.

New Media and New Marketing XIII

I had an interesting weekend. Did you? Spring is now upon us in all its glory, so I decided to spend a couple days inside staring at the Internet.

First, I found a few Facebook pages that seem useful: Writing Kindle Books, a closed group for, believe it or not, those who write books for Kindle. Another is called Book Worms, which is mostly for readers but has an area for authors to mention their books, and yet another is Christian Books, which apparently just helps people know what's out there. So I'm all over that. I also discovered Pixel of Ink, which highlights e-books that cost less than $1, so I'll probably be using them eventually.

The other notable event of the weekend was my first Sample Sunday, which I think may also have been the first ever. Sample Sunday is a Twitter event in which authors tweet about their book(s) and include the hashtag #samplesunday. Then followers are asked to retweet, and on and on, to gain exposure for the books. I joined in, and even though there's no way to tell if it meant anything, I'll continue on the next several Sundays. I can say that my Twitter followers grew by 50%. I'm just now figuring out Twitter, and I'll probably offer some thoughts about it later. In related news, the viewership of my video on YouTube is still going strong. But sales remain elusive.

I've got another marketing ploy up my sleeve, but I can't say anything about it now. If it develops, I'll certainly let you know.

New Media and New Marketing XII

Well, the big experiment is over, and it's report card time. All my books were 1/2 off at Smashwords for "Read an E-book Week." The week started out with a sudden sale of both "Feallengod" and "Wars of the Aoten," neither of which I'm promoting at all, and after that -- nothing. Not a peep. So, I conclude that my sales are not being affected by my prices being too high. And I don't think they're being affected by my attempts at promotion, either. Inexplicably, the day after the sale, somebody downloaded a sample of "The Job"; that guy's timing is off.

This past week I've joined Kindle Forum, which appears to be a small attempt at a social network for everything Kindle. I've also been active lately at Barnes and Noble's bulletin board. When you look up strategies for building an "author platform," as they call it, getting on bulletin boards is pushed as essential, but I have yet to draw much of a response to any of my threads. My posts do appear to get a number of views -- in a related matter, my YouTube video has increased its views by a third in the last three weeks, after being posted a couple of times on Kindle Boards -- but I can see no way they've inspired interest in the book itself.

So, that's a lot of complaining. Should I care about all this in the first place? More on that later.

New Media and New Marketing X

My animated video excerpt has broken through the 200-view level on YouTube. It's been up for almost six months, so that's not exactly viral. It's been seen in Slovakia and Vietnam, among other random world sites. I don't know how people can find it in those places, but so few see it in the English-speaking world. I did find a link to it at World News, a web page with an unique approach.

So the big news is the podcast version is now officially available and searchable at the iTunes store. The problem is, I don't know how to steer people toward it there, either. Am I whining now? What do you mean 'now'? Yeah, I'm whining, and I will until I figure this out.

Don't forget the giveaway!

Flim-Flannery

I'm re-reading some of the works of the great Southern Gothic author Flannery O'Connor. This will be only the second time I've gone through most of them, but still I'm finding the Christian themes easier to pick up. I've tried to track down some literary criticism of her works, and I've found that people basically obsess with "A Good Man is Hard to Find." More on that later.

First, I personally find fiction with Christian themes much more thought-provoking and meaningful than simple apologetics. This is why I love O'Connor and Dostoevsky so much. In fact, my favorite C.S. Lewis work is "Screwtape Letters," which is undeniably apologetics but brilliantly written in the voice of a fictional character. Perhaps straight apologetic writing just seems too much like a lecture to me, while fiction allows the reader to bring his own levels of understanding into the writer's thoughts. This is what I try to do.

Although my stories to date have been more straight-forward Christian in nature than O'Connor's, I still give that freedom of interpretation, particularly in "The Job." For instance, you can tell in Grace Krispy's review that she nearly gets it, but Mary Ann Langan's "review" reveals she doesn't get it at all. As I turn more toward Southern Gothic in my writing, I'll try to keep this connection to Christianity without letting it become a sledge hammer.

So, anyway "A Good Man is Hard to Find" apparently is accepted as O'Connor's seminal story in the eyes of most, although I'm not so sure ("Revelation" and "The Displaced Person" deserve some consideration). It certainly is the most direct story in putting forward O'Connor's idea that violence is "the extreme situation that best reveals what we are essentially." It's shock value is probably why the secular world has latched onto it. But O'Connor's overall Christian outlook within her work -- that of portraying "the action of grace in territory held largely by the devil" -- is a little harder to find, the grace part anyway. The grandmother tries to talk the Misfit into being a good man, even in a way comparing his blood to Jesus', but he makes her a good woman by sticking a gun in her face.


That's the extent of my literary criticism. You're free to write your own without my interference. I highly recommend O'Connor's work. I will add this last thing -- the Misfit's complaint that "I wasn't there so I can't say (Jesus) didn't (raise the dead). I wisht I had of been there. It ain't right I wasn't there because if I had of been there I would of known," is very close to Ivan Karamazov's complaint in "The Grand Inquisitor" -- if only Jesus would prove Himself to me, then I could believe.

Eragon-e

Get it? "Era-gone"? Oh well.


How do I hate thee? Let me count the ways -- Actually, I don't hate this travesty, but it's certainly a great example of what's wrong with modern publishing. First let me say I know virtually nothing about the book except what I saw in the movie version's trailer -- that it is a rip off of both "Lord of the Rings" and "Star Wars" mushed into one. In other words, as the old-time pundit, printer's-ink-in-the-veins journalists would say, it's "strictly boilerplate."

Probably violating some Amazon copyright here.


According to Wikipedia, the incredibly talented and home-schooled Christopher Paolini began writing "Eragon" when he was 15, and it was first published in 2002 by his parents' company, Paolini International LLC, which had been formed only five years before. He then toured some 135 schools promoting the book, so the folks definitely had plenty of financial resources to invest in marketing. Eventually "the stepson of author Carl Hiassen found Eragon in a bookstore and loved it, and Hiaasen brought it to the attention of his publisher, Alfred A. Knopf", and the rest is history.


This is an odd twist on "it's who you know," which is an absolutely true platitude in publishing, and also in succeeding (financially) in any of the entertainment arts. No respected agent or publisher would ever have given a second look to a book written by a 15-year-old, but his own parents sure would. Also no school would ever have given time to an adult wanting to promote his fantasy book to a captive audience of kids, but another kid -- wow, that would be inspirational. Christopher cashed in on the money and grunt work his parents invested, and on his own youth to find a core market, one of whom had a connection with a real publisher. All this for a story that will be completely forgotten by the next generation.


So I guess I'm just jealous, because in truth it's exactly what I'm doing. I've got my own "publishing" company simply to give "The Job" an existence before my core audience, which is Christian reviewers and media in general. My real hope is that one member of that market will see the real worth of "The Job" and become its advocate. It's a total shot in the dark, but let's face it, God loves weakness, and there really couldn't be much of a weaker attempt than this. We'll see what He does with it.

It ain't the way it used to be -- more about that later.

New Media and New Marketing IV

Here's a link to the latest review of "The Job", from Literary R&R. It is the most in-depth review so far, quite thoughtful, but still obviously falls short of fully understanding the book. A friend pointed out to me the letters of C.S. Lewis, in which he goes through a long list of reviews of "Out of the Silent Planet." The reviews were all glowing, but none of them understood the theological underpinnings of the story. I was prepared for this with "The Job"; in fact, it's somewhat gratifying to me that the story can be appreciated on several levels even by those who don't get it. I'm still awaiting that meaty review with real insight, though.


This all brings to a head the requirement that arts offer the consumer room for discovery. If an author (or painter, composer, etc.) makes his point so heavy-handedly that the consumer can't bring anything of himself into the work, then the artist has failed. The artist must be willing to allow the consumer to interpret the work either rightly or wrongly. I think I know what Dostoyevsky was getting at in "The Brothers Karamazov," but short of talking to him about it I'll never really know. But if I'm right, the man was a blinking genius. If an artist can leave an audience thinking that, whether they get it or not, then he's done pretty well.

A Joyful Heart is Good Medicine

So, what is Christian humor? Does such a thing exist, or should it? Shouldn't we all be morose repenters and worshipers all the time? Nah. Don't even want to talk about it. But I did wonder what forms "Christian" humor takes and how it serves the body of Christ. My first supposition is that to many, "Christian" means anything "clean," that is, the opposite of what are universally considered "dirty" jokes. My second supposition is that a large part of "Christian" humor consists of embarrassing typos or misstatements, which almost by definition implies unintended innuendo, which contradicts supposition #1. My third supposition is a lot of Christian "humor" is the pseudo-inspirational angel/little kid/cute animal theme epitomized by "Family Circus" and "Precious Moments," done over and over again and designed only for warm and fuzzies, not humor. So I proposed to check out these suppositions; in lieu of doing actual research, I did a Google search.

After a superficial amount of thought, I found that while the suppositions are pretty solid, they're too broad. For instance, within supposition #3 there's also a strain of jokes with the theme of smugly putting unbelievers in their place. But there's also a broader statement that can be made: "Christian humor" is generally lame (although here's a link to a website that contains some actually clever Christian humor). I guess this fact would also fall under supposition #3, but it takes in the first two as well. I mean, how often can you read bulletin bloopers before you begin to know exactly what to expect?

So what's the point, anyway? When taking up "The Job," I wanted to use humor in the same way the world uses it, not only simply for entertainment value but also for its therapeutic value. It's well-known that, at least in the Western world, people use humor to help us get over traumas, and certainly the story behind "The Job" would tap into that. But I knew that what is typically considered Christian humor would shut the book off from the general reading public, so I sought mainstream uses of what is considered funny (by me, anyway.) I wanted the humor to be sharp and insightful, bringing out points that showed where Joe B.'s mind and emotions were going. I also didn't want it to be lame.

More on all this later.

And now for something completely different ...

I am fascinated by photographs from the early to mid 1800s. The people then didn't know what they were supposed to look like. Exact imagery hadn't been around long enough (and Hollywood hadn't been invented yet) for a mass media to inform the general population what beauty was supposed to look like. So the people just looked like what they looked like. The faces you see are incredible, often weathered into caricature by life and sorrow. The current (Winter 2011) edition of American Heritage includes a collection of photos of survivors from the Revolutionary period. It's not online yet, but presumably it will be eventually.


Not long ago I started a project of rendering portraits of Old Testament personages in watercolor, such as this picture of Jonah. I didn't get very far. The point at hand is, Jonah's face is based on U.S. vice president and senator John C. Calhoun. You can just see this guy railing at God as if he had something to say. Even if I don't pursue the project again at some time, photos from the 1800s are a great resource for the way real people looked in a time when life was a lot more real than we can remember now.